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Saturday, January 21, 2023

YMCA, I am too old for Gwyneth

 Found in a basket, The lad's old " G.I joes". Who knew?  They never did want to make war or  blow up the nursery, they just wanted to dance.

------"It's fun to stay at the Y.M.C.A.

They have everything for you men to enjoyYou can hang out with all the boys---------"
 
, and now you can not get that out of your head!

-0-

I joined Instagram for inspiration and for the orphans, I tried to post some Orphan photos today but the top bar is missing, re-boot, refresh, all of the things....still unable to post or message or anything . Any answers? 

I am feeling something that feels like desperation. Maybe I just need to go for a walk in the weather  "dressed up in leather with a cap under my chin." But - ewww- it is so uninviting out there. I actually looked for old lady  health resorts online.  Costa Rica, California, Mexico...Florida! Looking was enough - spiritual, yoga, drinking green slime, eating one almond a day ,meditation, walking a labyrinth -not my cuppa.  GOOP popped up in the search. I have known about  GOOP for years but, really never looked at what Gwyneth  was up to other than the notorious  jade egg.

"Yoni eggs harness the power of energy work, crystal healing, and a Kegel-like physical practice. Insert the egg into your vagina and feel the connection with your body by squeezing and releasing the egg."

  Fancy that lifestyle? Possibly, if one had  loads of dosh and wanted to jump in that game, similar to a very expensive religion that promises  eternal youth and a oneness with  the  Universal  Hen, one could follow her. Anyway, GOOP is finally losing money and losing the gullible to other  flim flam. There is always something going on that provides "the answers to  your dreams, your insecurities, your everything". I will say that there is one GOOP device that looks rather sweet, It is  soft and heart shaped and has  buttons for varying levels of buzzes, Cute...yeah, I'll have that- for how much did you say???  Oh, OK never-mind.

In the end, no resort/health spa, no goop life, no walk out there in the shite weather...I will go through some closets and eat the rest of the Christmas biscuits, because I only gained twenty pounds over Christmas.  That will make me glad for twenty minutes I am sure. No telling what I may find- The YMCA disco GI Joes have pretty much made my day.

23 comments:

  1. GOOP is such a load of performative bullshit. I'm glad she's finally losing money, maybe she'll stop selling this crap. I have a instagram account, but I don't understand its organization at all. So I don't go there. Sorry your weather is so vile. Thanks for the ear worm, shouldn't take more than two or three days before something else replaces it.

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    1. GOOP is hilarious- not unlike religion- a fool born every minute. Gwyneth is cute, i will say that- who would not want the promise of looking so fresh and sunny? Insecurities are so easy to sell to, isn't that the lion's share of advertising?

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  2. I swear- I heard Gwyneth on a podcast interview and she sounded perfectly sane and normal and even like someone you would not mind having a conversation with, throwing the F-word about with abandon.
    But hell! All that bullshit. It's a conundrum.
    You know, I've been a bit worried that you might be suffering a touch of the black dog lately. From afar it seems like all of your merriment has been temporarily washed away by winter's rains. Any thoughts about going on the blue pill until things clear up a bit? Not that the world won't still be a shitty place but maybe dealing with it could be a little easier.
    I don't know. And I'm not a doctor. Thank god.

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    1. thinking the same thing I am sure I have some blue pills around here somewhere...I was a black puppy for about a week and now it is husky sized! Murder on my mind....

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    2. Oh darling. Don't wait for it to become a wolf.

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  3. GOOP is so weird. I felt that even before hearing of the amazing jade egg.
    Yeah, thanks for the ear worm.

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    Replies
    1. hahaha you are so welcome!! Joining me in bashing head against the wall to remove it!

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  4. I am so out of it. You would think with all the time I spend looking at the internet I would know what GOOP is or who Gwyneth is. I'm not on Instagram. Uh-oh, I'm so out of touch with the world. LOL!
    I hope you get some sunshine there.

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    1. It is probably good to be out of touch, it is silly in the world!

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  5. My total knowledge of goop came from magazine reports.
    Some explained why it was a wonder. Some explained why it's a disaster.
    And now it's gone.
    And tomorrow I can wear a Gwyneth dress for next to nothihg

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    Replies
    1. Maybe, though her clothing would have to double or triple in price to be reasonable. GOOP is not dead, there is always someone who will support it.

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  6. GOOP is nuts, in my opinion. Stick an egg where?? Huh. Watch some comedy...oh wait, no TV at your house now. Can you find funny YouTubes to watch? They might help, a good belly laugh might be just the thing. And just think, every day of cold and dark brings you closer to spring and sunshine.

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    1. Every year spring takes its time. Climate change has made it even more mysterious and un predictable. But yes, you are right. Spring will eventually come and we will wonder why we ever got the blues.

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  7. Fresca here.
    The dolls are even making the Y M C A arm signs!!!
    Yay!!! Sooo cute. The girlettes's arms could not bend--would have to hold letter signs.
    Which they would be happy to do!
    You sound like you need a disco night--dance the night away...!
    The orphans might like "We are Family! I got all my sisters and me!"

    What are blue pills? I only know Valium as blue, but I am behind on my pharma.


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  8. GOOP!? No thank you, I will not be pushing an egg into my vagina. Does it have a string on it to enable you to get it out? The bullshit people come up with to separate the gullible from their money. So, yeah, stick with the GI Joes and YMCA. It will probably have the same effect.

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    Replies
    1. vag"harness the power egg just cracks me up! Harness the power indeed!

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  9. We came here from the Chicago area and every PNW winter day seems like a blessing- with the exception of the recent snow/ice! At least we were warned and had stocked up but we never left the house until the magic 48 hr thaw. It's so green and lovely here- yes it's cold but you have nothing to shovel! Our daffodils are up about 3 inches. We had snow in IL which began in Nov and stuck around until late March sometimes. You have had some lovely things happen recently and you have your new plan to go to the U.K. That's wonderful. JanF

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    1. I thought I had died and gone to paradise when I moved here. Having been raised in the harshness of Wyoming anything other looked like heaven! So yeah , I \know, and the beauty here is exceptional. I have not reason to complain but yet I am...nothing to do with anything other than depression I reckon. Depression , inherited probably, is irrational and creative! Nancy Hanks , Abe's Mom, passed it on to us, says so in the fam tree....I have lived here without sunshine for too long I think. The recent snow/ice was a reprieve, I loved it!

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  10. Fresca here.
    I just looked at goop and see there's a Winter Recovery Kit--"this kit has all you need".
    Hey, Linda Sue--so, maybe that is all you need!? Some face goop? It's only $590!
    (The prices on that site!!! You said I am not judgmental, but here's an example of where I get SUPER judgmental--a tennis bracelet for $20,000?
    I don't even make that in a year!

    Curious about yoni eggs, I read up, and they do come with a hole to attach a string (optional)--but health sites say they do NOT recommend the eggs.
    ALSO---OMG---found this article at health.com:
    "Ob-Gyns Do Not Recommend Using An Electric Toothbrush As a Vibrator--Here's Why".

    So there ya go.

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    1. hahahaha Dear lord, that is not you being judgemental that is you being aghast and rightly so. I looked at her clothing- would do better finding stuff in your shop for about four thousand dollars less. electric toothbrush hahahaha. Surprised that is not on GOOP's site- dual purpose for only 80,000 dinar.

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    2. THE GOOP TOOTHBRUSH VIBRATOR!!! This should exist. You should be their development manager.
      --Fresca

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  11. I get it. I'm stress eating. So gray and gloomy out there and cold, too.

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