Feels like a tightening rubber band, this country, have to shake it off- Walking as far as we could walk today, Cubby wanting to be carried most of the way. I did not realize that dairy is not good for him, string cheese gave him problems, a tummy ache, poor little pooch. Consequently he kept me up all night, going out, coming in, going out...The only good thing about that is that I got to hear Big Ben's chimes for the last time, noon in London- crack of predawn here. Four years of renovation on that iconic building will be like having a loved one in hospital/ rehab ...scaffolding like bandages.
After walking to the dog park, and the bay, we came back up the trail back into the neighborhood.
On the street there were about twenty pots of plants in organic soil for the taking. Poster for lost cat.
This one tempted but I did not take. Number one, I could not carry it and Cubby at the same time- number two, I have no place safe to plant it.
The street had been blocked off for a neighborhood pot luck/ plant give away/ party/music
We did not stay, Cubby feeling unwell, and me feeling anti social.
I need time and space to process the lifting of the lid of the scum bucket , white supremacy, Nazis on our streets , unleashed racism / violence and ignorance and the Orange Baby giving his nod.
I remembered when "difference" first came to me at the movies...wrote this on FB yesterday- a memory.
When I was a little kid I could walk to the FOX theater and watch a matinee on Saturday afternoon for a quarter- plus five cents for pop corn. I would go alone and watch what ever was showing - it was the fifties in the middle of dirt- not much else going on. One Saturday Watching some lame Western offering- one cowboy said to the other something about " kill the spik" , The little girl sitting next to me , with whom I shared my popcorn and she shared licks on her Grape Charms pop- looked at each other and wondered what the hell was a spik? Her big sister had a very sad face and took her sister's hand and said " it is us".... I was "a spik" - we three walked from the theater - eye out for cowboys going to kill us, feeling gutted,- took a while for me to realize that no, actually I am one of those cowboys - privilege- so blindingly white - the sisters walked one direction and I the other, my tongue still purple and deliciously grapey from our sharing licks and spit, but the sisters could not come to my house to play- growing up in racist little Wyoming town. First dawning...damn
This is a very sharp memory- a stabbing to the heart.